Christmas Hiatus: Fry Havoc and Let’s Flip the Eggs of Morn

The blog is on hiatus for the Christmas season. New stories will return in January. Here’s one from the archives:

A slit appears in the darkness. A shaft of light floods my vision. One of us is needed. Will it be me?
A Hand reaches in. It grasps my brother, who sleeps beside me, and moves him to one side. It wants me. The Hand reaches in once more, grasps my handle and pulls me from the darkness into daylight.

I am placed on my back upon metal struts, they greet me as an old friend. I return their salutation, happy to make their company once more. Above me circles the bottle of gold. It tips, and the liquid contents fall gracefully onto my front. The splash is a cool sensation, and reminds me of the hundred times we’ve done this before.

There is a tick-tick-tick noise, then a familiar warmth appears against my back. Slowly at first, then it grows in strength. I am in my element now. I absorb the heat with my back and draw it through my body, spreading it across my front. This is my purpose, this is what I was made for, and I excel at the operation.

Under my influence, the golden liquid loosens. The Hand grasps my handle and I am drawn into the air, pivoted around so that the golden liquid slides across my surface, coating it evenly, and I am returned.

An ovate appears. The Hand smashes it upon my side. My sharp edges crack it open, and the golden treasure jumps out to embrace me.

The sizzling begins.


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